A Weight-ey Issue or Getting My Act Together

Ooops. I wrote this a week ago and forgot to post it. But I think it's worth sharing (because of course everyone is interested in mememememe) and it will be interesting to come back here a month from now and see if I hit the target this time. As of last week, 2016 was .0658% over and I hadn't yet mapped out the year with resolutions, plans and lists. At least, I hadn't completed all my lists. Of course, I never do complete them. Usually I just stop adding to them somewhere around Easter.

So - what's the hold-up? What's blocking the flow of New Year's Delight? What's causing me to suffer from Non-Startitis? Time to sit down with TheBrains and figure this thing out.

Okay, guys - what's going on? Why are we such slugs?

LEFT BRAIN: Ho Hum.  La de da da da.

RIGHT BRAIN: Where is the chocolate? Why doesn't anybody have any chocolate around here?

LEFT BRAIN: Vanity Vanity, life is Vanity

RIGHT BRAIN: I need sugar. No. Butter. Where's the butter?

LEFT BRAIN: I think I'll take a nap

RIGHT BRAIN: Cheese! No. I want Cheese. Macaroni and cheese. Lobster macaroni and cheese. with bacon. 


Hey Guys. This is not working. Besides. I know you're listening to me, even if you do pretend you're not.

LEFT BRAIN: Okay. What do you want now? La! I can't wait till I ...

DON'T say it.

RIGHT BRAIN: Say what?

LEFT BRAIN: Okay. I won't. But you know what WE are all thinking

It doesn't matter.  Putting all positive action off till that One Fine Morning will only ruin the here and now and leave a wake of unfinished obligations that shames us in the future. We're going to deal with the sluggishness of 2016 and we are going to start with the Weight Creep. You do realize we're heavier than we've been in 3 years, don't you?

LEFT BRAIN: Don't look at me. I'm not the one pawing through cabinets looking for cheesycocolatesugar bombs.

RIGHT BRAIN: Hey! We're all in this together.

She's right. We're all in this together and we are not all fitting into those skinny jeans, either. So what are WE going to do about it?

RIGHT BRAIN: Yeah, what are WE going to do about it, Miss Naggypants List-maker?

LEFT BRAIN: I've started many lists and whenever things get hard you just wander off. I can't make a list if you aren't giving me input.

Listen, guys, blame throwing isn't going to do us any good. So let's start with this question:  When it comes to our weight, what is non-negotiable?

LEFT BRAIN: Hmmmmm

RIGHT BRAIN: Uhhhhhh

LEFT BRAIN: Getting too fat for all our pretty clothes

RIGHT BRAIN: It has to be fun

Good - now - what is important?

LEFT BRAIN: Not paying Weight Watchers to go to their meetings

RIGHT BRAIN: Looking Hot Hot Hot

LEFT BRAIN: Being at goal

RIGHT BRAIN: Finding a way to eat and exercise that feels comfortable

LEFT BRAIN: But you know that can be hard

RIGHT BRAIN: I don't mind hard.

LEFT BRAIN: It takes time though, to plan and shop for healthy stuff

RIGHT BRAIN: I don't mind spending time and I love to shop

LEFT BRAIN: You have to decide, though. Decide what we are going to eat for the week.

RIGHT BRAIN: I know. It's hard for me to decide but ... but I like to try new things



this is all good. What else is important?

LEFT BRAIN: Health - strength, vigor, pride

RIGHT BRAIN: Yeah! I want to be a winner at the weight game!


Well - good. Good to hear you thinking this through

RIGHT BRAIN: ahem

With Feeling

RIGHT BRAIN: Thanks

So. is there anything that's desirable ... but maybe not really important.

LEFT BRAIN: Weight 143 lbs.

RIGHT BRAIN: Sculpted arms. too cool. wouldn't that be fun?

So are they important?

LEFT BRAIN: Nah. Just ... you know ... desirable.

RIGHT BRAIN: Yeah. I could live my life without either of those.

Okay - so ... What are we going to do about this?

LEFT BRAIN: Hmmmmm

RIGHT BRAIN: Uhhhhhh.

LEFT BRAIN: Ehhhhhh

RIGHT BRAIN: (Pssst. You got any sort of list)

LEFT BRAIN: Well. Okay. Umm. Let's start with the here and now. Let's start with what we weigh tonight at WW.

RIGHT BRAIN: I'm not sure I like WW any more.

LEFT BRAIN: Well, neither am I, but let's give it a try for, oh, say, 5 weeks. Till March 1.

RIGHT BRAIN: Okay.

LEFT BRAIN: So - we start with tonight's weight and we give it a real honest chance. We'll plan out our meals each week and shop for just that stuff.

RIGHT BRAIN: Uh. gulp. Okay.

LEFT BRAIN: We'll plan a dessert every night too.

RIGHT BRAIN: Oh. Whew. that's better.

LEFT BRAIN: but it has to come from the WW cookbooks and fit within the points.

RIGHT BRAIN: I'm good with that.

LEFT BRAIN: And we will get in 10K steps every day.

RIGHT BRAIN: what about the gym?

LEFT BRAIN: We can do that too or instead of, but the fitbit will register 10K steps. Come on - you know you want that. And you know why, you sneaky competitive thing you.

RIGHT BRAIN: (blushing) Yeah. I didn't think I was so competitive.

LEFT BRAIN: I know. In fact, you brag about not being competitive.

RIGHT BRAIN: Well, I don't really care if I'm not the best on the fitbit roster but I do care if I'm not the best AND I didn't reach 10K steps a day. I don't mind if I'm not the best but I mind if I didn't give myself a chance to be.

LEFT BRAIN: I knew that. It's one of the things I like about you. One last thing.... that I promise won't be too hard.  We're going to put a tall cup of water on the kitchen counter every morning when we're making coffee - and we're going to empty it twice

RIGHT BRAIN: Oh - easy peasy. the sink is right there.

LEFT BRAIN: ha ha - funny you. We will drink 2 tall cups of water every day. You know we'll feel better for that.

RIGHT BRAIN: Okay. Just foolin' with ya anyway.

LEFT BRAIN: Okay. So. You good with this plan?

RIGHT BRAIN: Actually - yes. I am.

LEFT BRAIN: Ready to start pawing through the cookbooks?

RIGHT BRAIN: yup.



Well. Good. This is a start. I'm glad you two have a plan. Let's see if we can lick this weight creep - and maybe unplugging that will unplug the creativity too.

LEFT BRAIN: Maybe

RIGHT BRAIN: May Bees don't fly in January either

Cute. Now, lets' roll.

Being At Goal - an ENFP's perspective

Did you ever take the Myers Briggs Personality Inventory? Do you know how you scored? Have you ever even heard of it?  Here's a link.

And here's a quote from their homepage:

"The essence of the theory is that much seemingly random variation in the behavior is actually quite orderly and consistent, being due to basic differences in the ways individuals prefer to use their perception and judgment."

And just for a little more help - Perception is all the ways people take in information and Judgement is the conclusions they come to based on what they've gathered.  In fact, the "P" and the "J" are the last two contrasting items on the inventory and people do tend to either enjoy the gathering process more or enjoy the coming to conclusions more.

I am a "P" and I LOVE the gathering process. What a good cavewoman I would make! A true hunter and gatherer.

The important thing to remember about all this is that - everyone can both gather enough information and come to conclusions - it's just that they fall into the two categories of preference.   As a "P" I finish tasks because I know I should - or even must.  I am a big girl and I can do what I have to do.  I even admire the finishers of this world. I hire them! I do this because that is their strength. Just thinking about what my desk looks like is proof to me that I am pure "P" on the spectrum and I have a quasi secretary who is pure "J" and together we accomplish a lot.  She often says "I don't see how you do so much" and I smile. I have quit trying to tell her I accomplish because she makes me - she doesn't believe me. Evidently that's one conclusion she won't acknowledge.

Given that TheQueen is such a "P" I think I have a unique perspective on the term "At Goal". For 3 years I have weighed within 10 lbs of a goal weight. The past 2 years I have been within 5 lbs or even smack on that number. The goal was selected back in 2003, in consultation with a WW leader who advised me not to select the highest allowable weight for my (then) height because she said studies show that even most successful people stay at or slightly above the top weight of their range. In the intervening 12 years I've shrunk an inch, so now, even when I am smack on my goal weight I'm also at the very last ounce for having a healthy BMI.

yeah yeah yeah - I can just hear my Right Brain    moaning "Oh Brother - here she is with the numbers again"

But I'm talking about Being At Goal and I'm trying to define what that actually means - to a person who doesn't like to come to closure.  At this very moment I weigh about 153 lbs if  I step on the scale naked.  I weigh in at the WW meeting on Tuesday and I won't be naked. I will be in a sleeveless summer dress, but not naked.  I am seriously thinking of taking our home scale with me to that meeting and calibrating it as soon as I weigh in. I hate guesstimating how close I am to the official goal weight when I am at home.  I would like to know. LOL. Not that I will believe - since believing means concluding and we all know I'm a "P"

But in the big picture of life - as if I really were a cave-woman - I would be and would have been at goal for 3 years.  So why doesn't it feel like that?  When do I feel like I am at goal? When is it true? And do I resist admitting that I'm at goal because I don't like things to come to an end? What does a person who is at goal feel like? What does she do on January 1?

 (and if I'm such a "P" why do I eradicate evidence of Christmas on January 1?  HA!  I don't! There will be Christmas clutter I forgot to put away being uncovered long into the summer. It never ends. I will never come to a conclusion. Bwa Ha Haaaaa! and Left Brain can't make me!) 

Ooops. sorry. Hunk Ra just channeled. It's a Doonesbury thing.

And of course - I still don't have any answers. I know I will whittle away a few excesses over the next few weeks so that I don't have to pay for a WW meeting. I like going to the meetings because you get to focus on an aspect of healthy living each week. Information gathering - it's a "P" thing. Also - I am buddying a friend to her goal and I know having me along helps - and I really like her and want her to succeed. She is a "J". She will honor that goal. She will savor and enjoy and delight in being at goal.

I will also explore some new foods and new ways of cooking this year.  Well. I always do. It's more "P" stuff. And I would like to experiment with planning out my meals for a week. This is a particularly difficult thing for a "P" to do because - hey - you know - conclusions.

But the by-product of coming to conclusions about the week's meals will be: I have more Free Time To Play! If I planed my meals and say, made crock pot meals - I could come home, hang up my coat - and voila! - dish up dinner.  I could budget time and money better. I could be perfect. I could be a "J"!    (Left Brain says, "my turn!")

Hmmm. Is something beginning to emerge from the fog of hunting and gathering? Could it be that Being At Goal - for an ENFP, that is - will always have to be about the by-products - not the goal itself?  Is it that we have to dance around the goal, aiming for Other Things, so that we get tricked into getting to goal too?

Now that I am at the "just tweak it" stage of weight loss/management I'll have to start examining more closely why it matters so much. Now that the health risks, the clothing options, the physical appearance part all have three years of experience and are beginning to feel normal instead of Fresh and New and Exciting and Brag-worthy it may be time to look a little deeper into my soul and ask it what it wants out of life.  Without the "Lose 20 lbs" target up ahead I feel a little lost. Nobody tells you this, but I suspect we all know it deep down. It may be what keeps so many of us clinging to the bad old ways, the sloth and slug activities, the bag of Cheetos.

So if you are not getting to goal when you know you can, when you've come so far, when you've gotten so close - maybe you need to dance around goal and aim for a different target. I bet, deep down inside you, there are Other Targets you want. I know there are for me. As they surface, I'll come back and share.

My Gold Brocade Slacks

On the long journey to a healthy weight, during one of the more successful periods when the scale was going down instead of up, I went shopping at a boutique.  I love to stop in little boutique-ey stores and poke among the pretties but I never buy clothes in them. I never even look at their clothing. Small little shops that have one off clothing never have big sizes - and big in those shops means a 12. The humiliation of flipping through a rack of size zeros and ones is a powerful teacher and I soon learned to stop looking.

Still and all, that early summer day there was, on the rack of winter sale items, a pair of gold brocade slacks - slim cut in the hip and marked a size 12. Also, they were marked down from some triple digit price to something like $24. The fabric was rich looking, tightly woven in a textured arabesque, not shiny or vulgar, definitely a luxury cloth. The pants were lined, too and they were narrow at the point where one's leg joins one's torso and the top had a curved bias piece tapering into the waist with no waistband at all.

They also matched, perfectly, the Christmas fantasy image in my head of me in a pair of gorgeous tan/gold slacks and a big cream colored pullover sweater ... lounging on a big couch in an elegant living room, with a fire, candlelight, wine, some quiet music and oh - hmmm - George Clooney looking at me with gleaming admiration .

So - so.

So I actually stepped into that foreign spot - a boutique dressing room - and tried them on. Well. Hmm. I couldn't zip them up. I could pull them on, though and I could still see that they were cut to work with my type of body - zero behind, bony hip join, fluffy upper hip, pouchy tummy, not enough inches between hip bone and rib cage.  And though I don't believe in buying clothes that don't fit, not only because I have limited closet space, but also because it's a kind of rejection of self to spend clothing $ on some other body, I plunked down that $24 - because I also knew that I wasn't going to see these fantasy fulfilling slacks again and I was bound and determined to turn that fantasy into a reality. (well, maybe not the George Clooney part ... but you never know)

So I bought them.  I actually forget what year it was. They lived in the attic over the summer but came down in cool weather.  I know I couldn't zip them that first Christmas, but I remember the day I announced at the WW meeting that I could at finally zip them up. Maybe I wouldn't wear them out anywhere, but they zipped at last - and that was spring of 2012. Last winter I wore them several times - because they're so perfect that I can dress them up or down - wear them to work or on a date. I even found the big cream colored pullover sweater to wear with them last Christmas (and finding that was a hilarious tale of shopping with BD)

Last night we went to a Christmas Concert in town and I pulled out my Gold Brocade Slacks for the first time and put them on. They felt delicious with their slick lining hugging my thighs while the gold brocade hung freely in a straight line. The zipper made that exciting ziiiiiiip sound as it closed without a struggle. They feel so good and they don't bag at the seat or bulge out at the upper thigh. They make me feel like a Christmas ornament. They are that perfect garment that makes you feel utterly right - and then - lets you forget, completely, about how you look, so you can concentrate on the important things - things like
the beautiful music in glory to God. The delight in being with friends in a hushed and spiritual setting. The camaraderie afterwards when we gather to chat and wish each other good tidings. But they are also a reminder of how you want to still be wearing these wonderful Gold Brocade Slacks on Christmas day - so you can step away from the treat laden tables and pass on the white fruit fudge, the real ginger snaps and the pecan divinity.

Yep. There's nothing like a pair of Gold Brocade Slacks to help you stay on track during the holidays. I hope you all have your own version of them hanging in your closet - or better yet - laid out on the bed to put on tonight.

Life is a Roller Coaster

This has been a full week - with ups and downs and goods and bads.

The DOWNS AND BADS -

1. Daylight Savings Time - an anathema for a morning person like me  
2. Baby Puppy Callie's broken leg 
3. 4 of my library staff down with bronchitis/flu/pneumonia 
4. Tuesday night board of supervisors meeting - had to skip gym and stay out late   
5. Began to feel 'off' Thursday and didn't feel any better on Friday. Actually feeling low down by the afternoon.
6. As a result of all above - have not gotten in the exercise I normally do  

The UPS AND GOODS -

1. Baby Puppy Callie back on at least 3 of her feet again after surgery. 
2. 2 of my sick library staff were much better by end of week
3. BoS meeting didn't last too long and I had good news to share that brought big smiles. Just in time for the budget sessions which start in 2 weeks.   
4. Got 3 big tasks done at work - three things that had been nagging at me and making me feel guilty. DONE! Yes.  
5. Had the absolutely most awesome strength training workout Thursday morning ever. Actually did 2 sets of pushups much deeper than I've ever done before.  
6. Got to go home early on Friday and slept 11 straight hours  
7. Got to within 2 lbs of my goal weight and no longer have to pay for WW meetings.  

What a week! Still, it looks like the good outweighed the bad. And sometimes a week is just like that. Plans had to change and routines got disrupted and most important of all - I had to adjust and adapt. I do regret not getting in the exercise I normally do because I seriously love exercise. But I don't worship it. It is high on my priority list but not at the top. Balance is at the top. And today I do feel better so I'll get in some exercise and some housework - which, around here, in the land of guys and dogs and farm fields, tends to be very aerobic.

A week like this doesn't leave much time or opportunity for creativity but I hope to get in some Art and some Fiber tomorrow. And on Monday I go to the city and after a brief dr. apt. I get to visit my mama, have lunch with my sister and shop for myself. That's a triple whammy! What a roller coaster ride!

Callie wishes a happy, healthy weekend to you all.

What's the Plan? My Left Brain and Right Brain figure out Thanksgiving Dining

Thursday, November 22, 2012

I thought you'd like to listen in on my School Marm Left Brain and my Wild Child Right Brain as they get ready for this Food Fest of a Day.

LB Happy Thanksgiving to you! How do you feel?

RB Thanks, pretty good. How do you Think?

LB LOL It's not HOW I think but WHAT ... and I think we look pretty durn good compared to a year ago - which was an improvement over the year before. Doin' good girlfriend

RB You know what? That's just how I feel too. I'm really proud of how slim I look and I really love that sparkly shirt we bought

LB Yeah - even though we DON'T NEED ANY MORE CLOTHES! I think we look good in it too, though. So. I am thinking also about how to keep on looking this good. I have a plan.

RB Why am I not surprised. I hope it isn't a Nothing Good To Eat plan

LB of Course not. I wouldn't ruin Thanksgiving for us. My plan is this. Let's figure out how many calories/points a modest thanksgiving dinner is and then decide how to eat around it the rest of the week. AND figure out how much more exercise we're going to have to get in to counter the "weight" of that dinner.

RB ...uh. OK. There will still be pie, right?

LB Absolutely. And thigh meat and dressing - but .. how about skipping the gravy?

RB What about the jello?

LB You betcha.

RB And cranberry sauce?

LB If you want it.

RB hmmm. and wine?

LB yep

RB Well. It doesn't look like I'll have to give up anything. what's the catch?

LB I think we might pass on the whipped cream with our pie.

RB well... okay. I'm always sort of sick by pie time anyway

LB And if you decide to NOT put butter on your roll - that saves something ... but that one is up to you. I've factored it in.

RB What about the surprise dish our guests are bringing?

LB I've factored that in. Plus the hour of housework we have to do and the 2 mile after dinner walk we'll take.

RB So. what's the damage?

LB Well - dinner will be about 2400 calories or 50 points. give or take

RB oh. that's a lot

LB It will be less if you eat less turkey thigh - but that's about the only place I can see you could cut back and ... even I don't want to do that

RB Me neither.

LB But we can shave off 4 points by taking that after dinner walk and cleaning this house - the floor looks awful!

RB LOL but we always do that anyway.

LB Yes - we do. But listen - this means we have oatmeal with apples for breakfast and only carrots and apples the WHOLE rest of the day.

RB I'm good with that.

LB I'm glad. It also means we only have 15 bonus points and 10 activity points .... about 1,000 calories of wiggle room the rest of the week and there will be ALL THAT PIE in the house.

RB Couldn't we give some of that away?

LB Yes! We can! And I plan to cook only enough mashed potatoes to eat up in this one meal. No Leftovers of that. You know that - it's not really this one big meal that causes so much damage. It's all the aftermath. The snacking. The pie for breakfast.

RB Yeah. I know. I wish ...

LB Don't go there. It's NOW. and it's HERE and TODAY deserves as much fun and attention and enjoyment as ANY Yesterday!

RB Okay. I won't go there. Besides, I'm looking forward to getting to know the K's better.

LB Me too. And sharing the beautiful autumn colors with two artists. Won't they love the views and the colors and the fresh air smell?

RB Yeah - I'm so thankful we could invite them this year. And really really thankful it's such a pretty day.

LB I'm thankful too - for the opportunity to have a smaller feast.

RB LOL I bet.

LB and we'll be taking long walks on Saturday and Sunday and maybe even going to the gym on Friday. We can rack up some exercise points this weekend. But we really have to eat only healthy nourishing food the rest of the week - in appropriate sized portions.

RB Yeah yeah yeah. I understand. But talk to me about THAT later because ... I can't care about Saturday when there's today to live in. Remember "It's NOW. and it's HERE and TODAY deserves as much fun and attention and enjoyment as ANY tomorrow!

LB Touche! And thanks for having this talk with me. I'm really THANKFUL for it. I love you, you know.

 RB I'm thankful for it too. Love ya right back